This morning I’ve spent several hours cleaning. I was getting into those places I’ve been avoiding for awhile but desperately needed to get to. And as I was cleaning I was thinking about the new cleaning schedule I’m trying out and deciding if and how I want to share it with you.
As I was scrubbing and thinking this morning, I recalled a comment I read on another blogger’s post about cleaning. I think I was reading a blog post about how to set aside time or when to set aside time to do cleaning to be most efficient. Who isn’t looking for that kind of advice!? Anyways, I scrolled through the comments and came to one that I actually had to read twice to make sure I understood what was being said. “Anonymous” had left a comment that outlined her incredibly important job of deadlines and overseeing employees, her community service, her family, her pets, her relationships, and her home. Then she said that until someone was doing all those same things, don’t write about some piddly cleaning plan. Oh. Ok. I’ll keep that in mind. Yikes.
In some ways, I get it. Some people’s lives, upon shallow observation, might seem a lot busier than mine. Some women work outside the home, are raising a family, have pets, are involved in different community activities, take part in weekly church groups….and they keep their house clean. So, within a few seconds, I started to judge myself.
Why don’t I keep my house immaculate if I’m home all day?
Am I lazy?
Does my family deserve for me to do a better job?
Should I be involved in more outside my home?
What else am I slacking on?
And there are probably more that went shooting through my brain, but these are the ones that then went on to my heart. These are the ones that tempted me to judge myself using Anonymous’s words.
These were the thoughts I had that completely deflated me.
Do you ever feel like you aren’t doing enough, aren’t doing it right, or should be doing more? Do you ever see someone else and you are just completely sure they have it all together. Their kids always have their hair perfectly done (hello, what happens after nap time?) and their outfits match all the time, even when it doesn’t matter. Wait, doesn’t your four year old insist on wearing her teal chevron leggings with her pink polka dot unicorn pajama top out to dinner? Cause mine certainly does. And some days that battle just aint worth fighting. Know what I mean?
Well, my friend, I’d like to suggest that judging ourselves so harshly based on external circumstances is a battle that just aint worth fighting either. Don’t wrestle with yourself when you see someone who seems to have it all together…or claims to on some blog comment. Just let those thoughts of ‘less than’ and ‘not good enough’ leave your beautiful mind as quickly as they flew in. Cause no two set of circumstances are the same. And, certainly, no two people are the same. You can handle some of the things that would bring me to instantaneous tears. And me…well, I can fly across the world with three kids under 4 with minimal crying and we all know that takes superhero power. I’m also raising my family in a totally foreign culture and learning another language. So, when you need some tips on that, just ask. And when I need to learn more about something you totally rock at, I’ll pick your brain. That, my dear, is how it’s supposed to be.
I know you’ve heard this message before. But I just wanted to remind you.
You are enough.
You are doing a great job.
And I bet, if Anonymous met you, she’d wish she could drop the act of having it all together so she could be friends with you.